Speaking takes a great part when, -Socializing in a group. However, most people find it hard to speak in groups especially when it’s a group of strangers. What people fail to understand is that everyone in the group feels the same way, whether introvert or extrovert. Individually, everyone feels like they are out of place, without realizing that even the most talkative person in the group is feeling the same and they are trying to fit-in by talking too much.
Several Do’s and Don’ts can help you improve on speaking in groups and thus, easy time socializing. They include:
Initiate the Conversation
Most people wait for others to start talking to them even when their inner person is pushing them to initiate the conversation. You might have a fear that maybe your efforts will be met with rejection, but this might never happen. You will be surprised to learn that even the other person is thinking the same, and you lose the chance by giving your fears a priority.
Keep the Smile
The last thing you want to do while in a group is make everyone avoid you. Keeping a smile makes you a friendly and an approachable person and you will be surprised by how many people will talk to you.
“Fake it till you make it”
You should apply this phrase while in a group. You might not like the conversations or might not find anything in the group fun. But, you don’t have to show it. Act like you are enjoying everything because it won’t take long anyway. This will make you more likable and you will fit in easily. People are interested in fun people and you should be one.
Dress for the Occasion
This is easy to ignore, but in reality, it plays a major role on how you feel in a group and thus how you socialize. It feels awkward to be in the middle of well-dressed individuals while you are poorly dressed. Receiving acknowledgments on your looks builds your confidence and self-esteem and it makes it easy to contribute or start conversations. However, don’t put on something that will make you feel uneasy, be yourself.
Listen and Keep Eye Contact
The worst thing to happen while conversing is to realize that no one is listening to you. The topic might be new or uninteresting but listen anyway. Nod where necessary, smile and show agreement. All these will be reciprocated when it’s your turn to speak.
Keeping an eye contact makes the speaker direct the conversation to you and here you can get a chance to contribute, interrupt or ask a question.
When it’s your turn to speak, avoid being too emotional about the topic. Don’t be judgmental or hateful. Rather, engage the members. Ask a question, listen to their opinion, avoid hasty generalizations and generally, pick a topic that you are well knowledgeable about. This will keep the listeners listening and actually let you speak again.
Avoid walking around all gloomy and with arms crossed. Be active and energetic. Remain open. People will always be looking for an active person to engage with. You can also approach a dull person, engage with them and this will make you feel better.
This is only possible if you clearly understand the kind of group you are in. There are topics you can’t start in a certain group because they will be totally boring. This might result to you being given negative labels. Know what interests your group and engage them.
Wonder around or Use your phone.
If it was that important, you should not be in the group. This is really boring, talking to people while you are constantly on your phone. People will dislike you and will not listen to you.
If someone gives you a smile, smile back at them. If you make a random eye contact, acknowledge that. This makes it easy for you to start a conversation latter because you have already presented yourself as approachable.
Most people judge a person even before talking to them. If you make a negative judgment about the person, you might never speak to them. You should know that most people are not what they appear to be, therefore, just approach anyone and talk to them.
Be Negative Critic
It is OK to criticize, but don’t let it dominate your conversation. This will create a negative picture of your personality and might draw people away from you.
Most people let the anxiety control them and they think by drinking too much will make the situation better. The possibility here is that you might end up embarrassing yourself by talking too much or misbehaving. You thus end up carrying the guilt with you and in future it gets even harder to be in a group. A drink or two may help you lubricate your social skills but getting drunk will force you into a state of inhibition.
In summary, don’t give the fear or the thought of how others will think about you a priority. Make it about you and do everything to make the moment enjoyable. Practice makes perfect, thus, use every chance you get to practice speaking in groups and -Socializing in a group will never be an issue.